Crab Dates Lobster

A crab and a lobster are secretly dating.

Pretty soon, the lobster tires of the lying and tells her father, who then forbids her to see the crab anymore.

"It'll never work, honey." he says to her. "Crabs walk side- ways and we walk straight."

"Please," she begs her father. "Just meet him once. I know you'll like him."

Her father finally relents and agrees to a one-time meeting, and she

runs off to share the good news with her crab sweetie.

The crab is so excited he decides to surprise his beloveds family.

He practices and practices until he can finally walk straight!

On the BIG day, he walks the entire way to the lobster's house as straight as he can.

Standing on the porch, and seeing the crab walking towards him, the lobster dad yells to his daughter....

"I knew it! Here comes that crab and he's really drunk!"

Labor Pain.

A married couple went to have their baby delivered.

Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the baby's father.

He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it. The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters,
explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before. However as the labor progressed, the husband felt

fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and kick it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this point, they decided to try for 50%. The Husband continued to feel quite well. Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out the wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him. The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain !!

She and her husband were ecstatic. When they got in the car to get home,

they found the DRIVER dead in the car !!

How To Sanitize Your Hard Disk?

Some people say with the click of delete button your hard disk gets sanitize. However, do yourself think so … well then check the recycle bin and see the list of deleted items, which you have removed and can b e recovered as well. For secure deletion of data, it is necessary to sanitize the hard disk with the help of a professional. But if you want to do it your self then buy the right hard disk erasure software. There are many companies these days offering with Free Hard Drive Eraser Software. This was in general we have talked about.

Well if you are a customer care company, then it becomes necessary to keep the confidential data about the clients, like credit card numbers, customer’s information, important policies completely secured. If you go on for a hard drive erasure, then you need to use multi pass scrubbing technique.

Beside this, there are three other ways of sanitizing the hard disk:

i) Physical destruction

ii) Overwriting the disk's data

iii) Degaussing

Some people prefer physical destruction of disk. This includes smelting and pulverizing of disk. If you think that this is an expensive method, well then overwrite the disk data using hard disk shredder. This is the proper and an economical way of secure data removal.

These all methods are suggested to those who want to sell their old hard disk, junk it or junk it then using the above methods is important. However, if you want to use the same hard disk then simple basic sanitizing is more than enough. In this you need to delete all the unwanted data, unused programs and reformat the disk completely.

Hot-Wax Mask Wipes Years Off Your Face

Hot-wax mask 'that wipes years off your face' is the latest A-list craze

London, Nov 20 (ANI): A hot-wax mask is nowadays the latest rage in skin care - the paraffin wax facial is a thermal mask billed as the quickest way to a "non-surgical face lift".

Celebrity facial Emma Hardie came up with the idea of the mask, which is painted on to the skin and then kept warm under infrared light, after an hour's intensive massage.

During the massage, she uses moisturizing oils and massage to stimulate the skin cells and a 'deep-tissue' kneading technique to give softer, plumper skin. And then comes the mask, which helps the skin to absorb the moisturizing oils and soothes and relaxes the facial muscles to help release tension and leave the skin bright and glowing.

The treatment, which costs 160 pounds, is the quickest route to a non-surgical face lift and promises "instant and noticeable results after one session."

Sophie Dahl, Denise Van Outen and Anjelica Huston are amongst few of her celeb customers.

"This facial is a wonderful treat for a cold, winter's evening and the warm wax helps you feel like you're in the Tropics. The massage and wax helps to boost circulation in the skin and helps to relax the facial muscles," The Daily Mail quoted Hardie as saying.

She also claims that the treatment can help with migraine relief, sinus problems, head, neck and shoulder tension, depression, menopause, grief and insomnia.

"Wax is very softening and it's very good as a skin treatment.We use it a lot on dry hands and chapped skin. It helps to oxygenate and detoxify the skin," she said.

Alice Hart-Davis, a beauty journalist, said that wax was widely recognized for its skin-softening effects in the beauty world.

"It is usually used in manicures and pedicures, but there's no denying that it could also work very well as part of a facial," she said. (ANI)

Google's Online Book to Demystify The Web

LONDON (IANS): Google has published an online book on "things you've always wanted to know about the web and browsers but may have been afraid to ask", a posting on the company blog said.

The search engine has commemorated the 20th anniversary of a paper crucial to the Web's development by producing the book.

Writing on Google Blog, Chrome Product Marketing Manager Min Li Chan explained that the book aimed to answer basic questions, the Telegraph reported.

"How do browsers and the Web actually work? What is HTML5 - or HTML , for that matter? What do terms like 'cookies' or 'cloud computing' even mean?" he wrote.

More practically, how can we keep ourselves safe from security threats like viruses when we're online?

"To help answer these questions, we collaborated with the wonderful illustrator Christoph Niemann to publish an online guidebook called "20 Things I Learned about Browsers and the Web."

"This handy guide is for those of us who'd like to better understand the technologies we use every day."

The book uses HTML5, the latest Web language, and can be downloaded.

"We built '20 Things' in HTML5 so that we could incorporate features that hearken back to what we love about books - feeling the heft of a book's cover, flipping a page or even reading under the covers with a flashlight," Min wrote.